urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy What an eccentric performance. METRIC. 2009-11-23T18:33:07Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:206407 2009-11-23T18:33:07Z 2009-11-23T18:33:07Z another day in paradise. going to work at madres in fifteen minutes. about to be doing the exact same thing i did last monday. wearing the exact same thing i ever wear to work. biking the exact same route, granted there really are no other routes. my feet are cold. my heart is cold. i cant quite figure out why. what do i do to get out of this funk. i am so stuck. geeze la wheeze. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:206313 2009-10-25T18:00:28Z 2009-10-25T18:00:28Z dear lorelei and self.<br />st. augustine is too easy. i am dying for a challenge. dont give up. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:205991 2009-10-16T22:31:23Z 2009-10-16T22:31:23Z i think we have different ideas of fun. <br /><br />does this sentence seem kind of unnecessary to you? urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:205784 2009-10-15T20:48:19Z 2009-10-15T20:48:19Z raw food diets don't agree with my tummy. i am so hungers but the thought of eating another slice of raw squash is nauseating. i continue to listen to devendra banhart and miss my lorelei even more. im going insaner by the day, because i have nothing left to look foreward to except going to sleep at night. it is october again. i wish it was lst october and we were on our way to silly halloween party at taylors. i wish i could see joel in his ninja outfit eating potatoe chips at a kegger. good times. when do we go to LA? can it be soon? im about to go to publix ad buy some sushi. :( urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:205403 2009-09-17T01:27:22Z 2009-09-17T01:27:22Z oh hey. yeah. still going crazy. maybe i should put A little shake in my step. wiggle out of here like some goddamn buffoon. theres a fire under my ass and i dont know how it got started but theres one thing i do know, it's that someday im gonna be happier than i am now. and that thought keeps me going. its like i chained myself up on my own accord. and that weight im draggin around is all those little things that keep me here and now. perhaps i should give all my money to the poor. feed the hungry, clothe the cold. noble stuff. i feel so selfish for wanting the things i do because theres about a million other souls out there who don't want; they only need. i don't NEED anything. i've got food in my belly, a roof over my head, nice clothes, nice fucking things. ive got shit i dont even want. and theres people out there who dont have enough to even feed their babies. what a fucking consumer ive become. it makes me sick to my stomache. or that could be from too much food. one or the other it doesn;t make me feel any better. <br /><br />and somehow i feel even worse now that ive re-read what just came out of my brain. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:205305 2009-09-09T13:16:00Z 2009-09-09T13:16:00Z new things and the same old shite. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:204948 2009-08-31T16:41:05Z 2009-08-31T16:41:05Z oh hey inter web. secondly, whats with life these days? it just gets weirder and stranger. the days just slip by and all i can do is let them. what happens when you love someone, but they won't talk to you about all the important stuff. they wont let any feelings show other than happy? i know there's something going on inside the head but it wont, maybe cant, come out. how do you get the person who you thought could tell you anything, and vice versa, to open up to the person they really are? i think in our years of knowing each other, they have regressed, rather than taken many steps forward. im not so sure what to do in a situation like that. anyone?<br /><br />on another note im going on tour with lighthouse music again. and i cant wait. i need to go places and see things to ensure im still sane within the next year. this whole living in st. Augustine thing is really bringing me down. among other issues. <br /><br />why cant i just get it right sometimes. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:204797 2009-07-12T17:58:08Z 2009-07-12T17:58:08Z well here we are again. horizontal and aching. i wonder if the reason for all of this pain should be apparent to me, but i find myself still trying to come up with one, to no avail. possibly it could be something deeper than just physical pain. possibly mental. the two sometimes go hand in hand. which causes which i cant be sure. the good doctors of web MD dont even know. so what now. i lie here, uninsured, fearing to go to the doctors because of some reason or another. and the longer i lie here the more happiness is drained out of me. i dont want to see anyone. i dont want to do anything. it scares me. i feel like i am hurting those who see me hurting, and that is doubly troubling. i want my mom. i wish she was the super woman of my childhood. she who could heal all wounds and fix all fears. those days are over. not that she cant do those things now, but i guess my childhood troubles were things that could easily be remedied by the mom touch. a reassuring hug and a favorite meal. its gotten much more complicated since then. or has it? im not having to cope with another female figure leaving my life. im not having to deal with my father using me as a crutch for his emotional downfalls anymore. so why am i so unhappy? what can i do about this? its getting real old. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:204459 2009-07-08T01:03:57Z 2009-07-08T01:03:57Z In the beginning there was nothing. And then, out of the ashes, there became Brian Piccolo. Born of the stars and breast fed upon the teat of the galaxy Milky Way, Brian Piccolo would become 1) a simple travel soccer coach, and 2) a legendary icon, beloved by the quaint citizens of Cooper city, and the world. At the age of six Brian Piccolo discovered his fondness for cows. He single handedly rounded up almost thirty cows with but a mere flash of the teeth. No man, woman, or cow could resist such a grin. Brian Piccolo then taught each cow the art of carpentry and fence building. They built a fence so high some say you could see all the way to mid-cooper city! But due to the neighboring Pembroke Pines vaulted fence ordinance, it was scaled back to regulation size (all labor by cows). One day Brian Piccolo was tilling the soil and checking the PH balance, when all of a sudden for no apparent reason, the cows started totally freaking out, and soon young Brian Piccolo would be hospitalized due to severe trampling. <br /> In his bed he wondered why, but knew nothing until his doctor/cow doctor, Andora Creterson, informed him that both him and his cows had come down with a bad case of cancer. Brian Piccolo would be in intensive care for a year. While bed-ridden he made use of his free time by crafting miniature replicas of famous sports arenas. He found that in doing so, his finger dexterity had increased to almost super-human abilities. While crafting a particularly troublesome model of a brazilin futbol stadium and simultaneously eating a lunch of steamed veggies and rice, a pea fell out of his mouth and onto the replica. With a flick of his finger the pea went rocketing into the goal net. And thus, the first travel soccer game was played. Dr. Andora Creterson had grossly underestimated the length of Brian Piccolo’s treatment, but in her defense, she was stretched quite thin due to the growing popularity of her widely acclaimed Ball Movement. <br /> For the next twenty years Brian Piccolo was in and out of treatment, and stuck in bed for most of it. But his passion for life had not dwindled. He had found new meaning through the lively sport of travel soccer, and soon, finger jockeys from around the globe were jet-setting their asses to the Anna Nicole Smith Skyscraper Memorial Hospital in Cooper City, just to take a crack at the incredible Brian Piccolo. In a few short weeks, travel soccer teams were popping up all over and they all wanted Brian Piccolo as their coach. Brian Piccolo wanted to coach them all, but couldn’t because of the cancer thing. So, Brian Piccolo, with the help of legendary filmmaker Andora Creterson, developed a series of travel soccer training videos. They became an instant hit and were entitled Travel Soccer Phenom: It Can Be You, with Brian Piccolo. With the money he made from the videos he was able to fly in top cancer specialist, Simeon Simeon, to perform some crazy cancer surgery on him and all his cows. <br /> The now cured Brian Piccolo and his band of cows purchased a manor on Silver Star Road in the mid-central district of Cooper City. For a couple of weeks things stayed pretty low key for Brian Piccolo. He just hung out at his house, swam with his cows in the giant cow-shaped pool, and read like a thousand issues of Soil Experts Weekly. But everything was about to change. The mayor of Cooper City had been caught dealing in shifty business involving the illegal trafficking of rare spined cactus lizards. The spines of the lizards could be used to create a highly potent toxin that created the illusion of weightlessness and severed hallucinations. He had also developed a nasty addiction to the stuff and was dragged out of office screaming about needing something to weigh him down, and ink sacs. Brian Piccolo heard the news and had the notion to seize a once in a lifetime opportunity. Brian Piccolo ran for the title of city mayor (unopposed) and won. He also decided upon coaching the Cooper City Elementary travel soccer team, The Cows. Brian Piccolo had reached the top. <br /> Brian Piccolo made mostly good executive decisions; he ordered for the banning of all pesticides, the guarantee of a weekly parade and, and no smoking with concern for the health for their now state champion travel soccer team. The town of Cooper City was so pleased with Brian Piccolo’s mayoral reign that they opted to change the title of mayor to the title of Brian Piccolo. That Sunday they held the first parade. It was a grand spectacle (the grandest possible with only sixteen citizens living in Cooper City). Heading the parade was but of course Brian Piccolo, majestically poised on the back of his favorite cow, Lady Firehooves. Dressed in cargo shorts and a denim half vest, a silk sash draped around his left shoulder, he led them the perimeter of Cooper City and down the middle to town center. Rearing up the end was Dr. Andora Creterson and her lover, Simeon Simeon, both riding a bull steer decorated with the finest of ribbons and impressive doodads. At. Town center they held a festival of compliments, all of which were directed toward the man of the century, Brian Piccolo. (One toward Lady Firehooves). At the podium with a foot long coney hot dog in his right hand, he pronounced that very moment to be the happiest of his life. <br /> Suddenly, tragedy struck! Brian Piccolo dropped his coney and fell to his knees. It was cancer, back for revenge. There was a sixteen-fold gasp and Dr. Andora Creterson leapt from the steer, Cornerstone, and clutched Brian Piccolo firmly in her arms. Brian Piccolo gazed up at Dr. Andora Creterson with glazed eyes and whispered his last words. And then, Brian Piccolo was gone. Wiping a tear from her eye, Dr. Andora Creterson stood and pronounced the beloved Brian Piccolo dead. Simeon Simeon brought in a casket made out of solid ivory he had procured from a traveling casket and antique teapot salesman. They buried Brian Piccolo in the field where the first fence was erected. Dr. Andora Creterson played a short-sweet trumpet solo, and that was that. <br /> The town of cooper city decided to hold a grand travel soccer tournament in memoriam of the great Brian Piccolo. Travel soccer teams from around the world came to Cooper City to compete in Brian Piccolo’s honor. Yet before the tournament was scheduled to begin, the people of Cooper City realized that there was no one to referee the match. One man shouted out into the crowd asking if anyone was able and qualified to do the job. Silence. And then a familiar voice boomed from across the crowd. “I’ll do it.” The mob slowly parted down the center and up walked none other than the undead Brian Piccolo. A collective murmur washed over the people. Thanks to Dr. Andora Creterson’s brilliant knowledge of human and cow bodies, she had reanimated Brian Piccolo with completely new cow organs. Oh, and he was also immortal. Brian Piccolo asked to see his cows, but sadly it was told to him that, like true lovers, they had all died within a week of Brian Piccolo’s death. It is thought that they all died of udder sorrow. But one would live on, for the new hearth that was beating inside of Brian Piccolo’s chest was that of Lady Firehoove’s. <br /> Brian Piccolo continued to ref the occasional travel soccer game, and got a whole new batch of cows. He declined, though, to regain his title of Brian Piccolo, so the city had to elect a new one. Eventually Simeon Simeon was elected as new Brian Piccolo, and Brian Piccolo now tends to the Brian Piccolo Memorial Park in Cooper City, a very special place. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:204149 2009-07-02T16:26:27Z 2009-07-02T16:26:27Z well its been a long time since i have said anything to you dear livejournal and you're probably thinking, hey am i only just for reading about your friends or are you gonna talk to me or what? sorry livejournal, i know you are probably pissed. my b. so i am sore. that is mostly the only news i have for you. i feel super awkward at the gym because i dont know what half of the machines do and i have to walk around and wait until i see someone using them and then i go, ooooooooooooooooh... and after they are done try it myself. i need new headphones so i can block out anything else like terrible news talkshows and divorce court episodes while i run. i cut my bangs again and totally did it lopsided, but whatevs its hair and it will always grow back. i have a totally fucked up skeleton according to dr. monahan aka the devil in a person suit, who tells me i should be going to the chiropractor three times a week for a month and i say fuck that shit. i will go to yoga instead and hopefully i will correct the awful situation going on in my body. went to the vag doctor the other day and the damn douche told me to wear a bra. i was like fuck that shit. but the ladies have been awfully sensitive lately. well i know i am terribly boring so i willl go. later lj.<br />sneeze. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:203779 2009-05-31T22:58:00Z 2009-05-31T22:58:00Z In the beginning there was nothing. And then, out of the ashes, there became Brian Piccolo. Born of the stars and breast fed upon the teat of the galaxy Milky Way, Brian Piccolo would become 1) a simple travel soccer coach, and 2) a legendary icon, beloved by the quaint citizens of Cooper city, and the world. At the age of six Brian Piccolo discovered his fondness for cows. He single handedly rounded up almost thirty cows with but a mere flash of the teeth. No man, woman, or cow could resist such a grin. Brian Piccolo then taught each cow the art of carpentry and fence-building. They built a fence so high some say you could see all the way to mid-cooper city! But due to the neighboring Pembroke Pines vaulted fence ordinance, it was scaled back to regulation size (all labor by cows). One day Brian Piccolo was tilling the soil and checking the PH balance, when all of a sudden for no apparent reason, the cows started totally freaking out, and soon young Brian Piccolo would be hospitalized due to severe trampling. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:203638 2009-05-30T16:33:35Z 2009-05-30T16:33:35Z everything is so shitty. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:203398 2009-05-04T21:26:37Z 2009-05-04T21:26:37Z Orlando:<br />1. Axis Magazine<br />-P.O. Box 2391, Orlando, FL 32082<br />-editorial@axismag.com<br /><br />2. Orlando Weekly<br />-100 W. Livingston St., Orlando, FL 32081<br /><br />3. Orlando Sentinal<br />-633 N. Orange Ave, Orlando, FL 32081<br /><br />Ft. Lauderdale<br />1. City Link Magazine<br />-200 E. Las Olas Blvd., Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33301<br /><br />Miami<br />1. Miami New Times<br />- P.O. Box 001591, Miami, FL 33101-1591<br /><br />2. Miami Art Zine<br />-Miami Beach Arts Trust, P.O. Box 402584, Miami Beach, FL 33140<br /><br />Gainesville<br />1. Gainesville Sun<br />-P.O. Box 147147, Gainesville, FL 32614-7147<br /><br />Tallahassee<br />1.Fsview & Florida Flambeau<br />-954 West Brevard Street, Tallahassee, FL 32304<br /><br />2.Tallahassee Democrat<br />-277 N. Magnolia Drive, Tallahassee, FL 32301<br /><br />Pensacola<br />1. The Independent News <br />-P.O. Box 12082, Pensacola, FL 32591<br /><br />2. Pensacola News Journal<br />- c/o Weekender, P. O. Box 12710, Pensacola, FL 32591<br /><br /><br />New Orleans<br />1. New Orleans Gambit<br />-Gambit Communications, Inc., 3923 Bienville St., New Orleans, LA 70119<br /><br />2. Offbeat Publications<br />-Offbeat Music Magazine & The Louisiana Music Directory, 421 Frenchmen Street, Suite 200, New Orleans, LA 70116<br /><br />3. The Louisiana Weekly<br />- 2215 Pelopidas Street, New Orleans, LA. 70122.<br /><br />Jacksonville<br />1. Folio Weekly<br />-9456 Philips Hwy, Suite 11, Jacksonville, FL 32256-1351 <br /><br />2. Florida Times-Union<br />-P.O. Box 1949 Jacksonville, FL 32231<br /><br />New York<br />1. The Village Voice<br />- 36 Cooper Square , New York, New York 10003 <br /><br />2. Time Out New York<br />- 475 Tenth Avenue, 12th floor, New York, NY 10018<br /><br />Richmond<br />1. Style Weekly<br />-1313 East Main St. Suite 103, Richmond, VA 23219 <br /><br />2. Brick Weekly<br />- 300 East Franklin Street, Richmond, VA 23219 urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:203047 2009-05-02T14:03:39Z 2009-05-02T14:03:39Z so how about next morning beer poops.<br />they suck, huh? urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:202799 2009-04-16T05:41:28Z 2009-04-16T05:41:28Z mason jennings too good. hello internet goers out there in livejournal universe. I really need to stop eating over my computer because (A) they say you eat more when you focus on other things while you are eating and (B) some of my keys are not working properly because there is food stuck up under them. I am wholly dissapointed in microsoft/dell lately. Whomever is responsible for the faulty craftsmanship driving my computer to shout things at me and react in the slowest manner possible, resulting in much cursing on my part. <br /><br />I can't beleive Taylor is getting married to Kieran. I mean i can totally beleive it, but just thinking about the night they met being so silly and all. I could never have imagined how things got to be the way they are now, back then. Also Eloise being born. That was crazy. I can't wait to meet her. I can't wait to see bonnie again. I can't wait to see everyone. Four more days. Tomorrow I will ship things on amtrak and on Sunday i will brave the twelve hour flight to return back to the soil of my youth. <br /><br />im going to smuggle ghostface killah under my sweater and tell airport personelle I am pregnant with a wolfmanbaby. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:202707 2009-04-14T18:33:28Z 2009-04-14T18:33:28Z Oh livejournal, how you put so many things into perspective. Reading old entries, i was fucking annoying. thie things i wrote sound just like the kinds of things max says. She is in 6th grade, WTF?! i wanted to grwo up so fast. im not saying i would like to reverse and go back to the days of prepubescent awkwardness, but the thought of the simple times, when i had no real worries only worries of boys and high school, it is strangley appealing. <br /><br />my hair is so gross. it is so itchy ad every time i itch it theres all this gross shite in my fingernails. yuck. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:202345 2009-04-14T18:00:50Z 2009-04-14T18:00:50Z <div class='appwidget appwidget-qotd' id='LJWidget_2'> <table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"><tr><td><div style='border: 1px solid #000; padding: 6px;'><p>LiveJournal is turning 10 and we're feeling nostalgic. What was your first LJ post about?</p><p style='font-size: 0.8em;'></p><br /><p><input type="button" value="Answer" onclick="document.location.href='http://www.livejournal.com/update.bml?qotd=849'" /> <a target="_blank" href="http://www.livejournal.com/misc/latestqotd.bml?qid=849">View 503 Answers</a></p></div></td></tr></table></div><!-- end .appwidget-qotd --> <br />josh powell. BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHahahahahahahahahahahahahah! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:202157 2009-04-10T09:39:25Z 2009-04-10T09:39:25Z I AM CREATING CINEMATIC GOLD RIGHT HERE IN MY ROOM. tomorrow i will tackle the outside world. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:201938 2009-04-10T06:47:56Z 2009-04-10T06:47:56Z i think i just decided that my favorite word is "awesome". urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:201666 2009-04-09T06:51:01Z 2009-04-09T06:51:01Z it doesnt make me feel good to hear that collin isnt good enough for me. i just want him to grow up a little bit i guess. i really wish he would stop smoking. i wonder if he will if i ask him to. he has said he would, but it makes me sad to say i dont beleive him. and its not to spite me, its out of habit, which is still not a good thing. i... dont have words. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:201303 2009-04-08T18:12:49Z 2009-04-08T18:12:49Z <div class='appwidget appwidget-qotd' id='LJWidget_3'> <table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"><tr><td><div style='border: 1px solid #000; padding: 6px;'><p>If you discovered a new planet, what would you name it?</p><p style='font-size: 0.8em;'>Submitted By <span class='ljuser ljuser-name_thethicket' lj:user='thethicket' style='white-space: nowrap;'><a href='http://thethicket.livejournal.com/profile'><img src='http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif' alt='[info]' width='17' height='17' style='vertical-align: bottom; border: 0; padding-right: 1px;' /></a><a href='http://thethicket.livejournal.com/'><b>thethicket</b></a></span><br /></p><br /><p><input type="button" value="Answer" onclick="document.location.href='http://www.livejournal.com/update.bml?qotd=851'" /> <a target="_blank" href="http://www.livejournal.com/misc/latestqotd.bml?qid=851">View 505 Answers</a></p></div></td></tr></table></div><!-- end .appwidget-qotd --> <br />Boobcity. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:200969 2009-04-03T21:03:15Z 2009-04-03T21:03:15Z wow. it was sunny for all of three seconds. WTF PORTLAND?! urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:200721 2009-04-02T20:11:05Z 2009-04-02T20:11:05Z hello livejournal. another day of grey in the great big portland city. went to the mall yesterday and found a 20 dollar bunny carrier, that was good. also seriously considered buying a 3 dollar mouse. theyre so cute i wanted to so bad, but i restrained myself. smelled the parfumes at macy's. went into forever 21 and decided that i would be suicidal if i worked there due to the MUSIC BEING SO LOUD! watched all the little girls prance around the ice rink to aladin's "I Can Show You the World." and went home. <br /><br />now today i cant decide what to do with myself as always. crossword. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:200611 2009-04-01T18:03:24Z 2009-04-01T18:03:24Z tubers show last night at slabtown so completely rocked. jacob got me into the show because it was 21 and over. it was so good to see jacob and jeff again. rich asked me if he knew me as he was walking by, haha. oh well now he knows. i also met james magnifico. this is how it went down: jacob was showing me a thousand pictures on his phone of their day trip to mt. hood and to THE SHINING LODGE! and james walked up and jacob introduced him as james ( he played last night in Old Growth) and told me he was in True North as well, i promptly shouted OOOOOOOOOOOH MAGNIFICO! AWESOME. i gave him my phone number so we can go on grand hikes. another show on the 12th at o'malleys pub. good night in all.<br /><br />p.s. hannah, lorelei is taking a shower and just turned on some music, i totally thought she was listeing to stork patrol until they started singing. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:kinkydicktracy:200294 2009-03-25T21:39:28Z 2009-03-25T21:39:28Z gone to buy carpet cleaning agents. <br />watercolors, rabbit pee, rabbit poop, cat throwup.<br />It's a fucking fiesta of grossness.<br /><br />YAY JENN's HOME!